Supergirl Fails

Last night after a family barbecue I was laying in my bed thinking what a great blog idea I had and this morning... I cant for the life of me even think of what was so important I actually almost got out of bed to get my computer.

I have weird random health issues that my kids term hypochondria. I wish it was that simple. I know the symptoms are real and they are confusing and most doctors dont want to hear it so I frequently diagnose and treat myself. That does not make me a hypochondriac, that makes me an amateur doctor with creative license of diagnosis and treatment. My father is an amateur pharmacist so once I prescribe something he can usually dig it out of his underwear draw. We make a solid team.

So one of my many issues is what the doctors term glucose intolerance/insulin resistance, hypoglycemia,borderline diabetic, whatever.

the result of this is that when I eat sugar my pancreas does not make insulin right away. It lags behind, like its outside smoking pot with liver and kidneys. Then as the sugar is floating around my body reeking havoc on my organs my pancreas is like holy shit man there is sugar in here I better go after one more toke of weed man.

so then it goes into overdrive and spits out too much insulin. And I crash.

the reason I tell you this is because when I drink alcohol, the same thing.

So at the family barbecue I didnt eat because really I thought the food sucked. I panicked at the last minute and went and bought chicken and sausage and peppers and then the barbecue didnt behave, whatever I wasnt really happy with the food. So I ate a sausage and some peppers and some macaroni salad.

and I had a beer.

And I felt fine.

So I had another one.

Then after everyone left, D1 and friend and I cracked open a bottle of Moscato wine which I love.

And I had a glass.

and I felt fine.

so I had 3 more.

And then I went to sleep.

And during the night when my pancreas got back from the hood, smoking crack and basically stumbling around in the dark, it took over.

and there is a good chance I am drunk right now.

and i wondered as i drove D3 to school this morning if you could get pulled over at 7am for being drunk when you havent had a drink in 10 hours.

It was my bodies fault officer, mainly my pancreas that decided to wait until about 5am to start working flooded my body with insulin and poof here I am.

I have already had two cups of coffee and yet I still feel dizzy and lightheaded.

I am sure that is why I cant think of last nights excellent blog idea.

In any case... we had a family bbq to celebrate D1s graduation and D3 turning 16. It started out as just the usual crowd but we added some new faces and frankly that saved the day.

MON I have to say we totally missed your moms excellent deviled eggs and how she and I would stay in the kitchen and bitch about everyone.

We have the Muriel rule in place now, no talking about people while they are still within ear shot and check your cell phone to make sure it is not drunk dialing as you are talking about people.

I know you are thinking why not just stop talking about people.

What else do you want me to do stop breathing?

So the food sucked and some of the company was less than desirable but for the most part, I guess it was fine.

I am hypercritical of my parties and on a scale of one to ten this rated somewhere around a 4 for food and like an 8 for entertainment.

I was reminded twice of how much I have to live up to based on past performance though. My cousin called to say that they couldnt make it and she said my uncle was dissapointed because "nancy always puts out a nice spread"

Then my mother in law said... oh my god nancy how do you do it all? When we got the invitation I thought how is Nancy doing all this, school, work, the kids, the party, the vacation...

and i thought yeah how am I doing all this...

and a lot more going on that people dont know about.

Seriously the vegetables were too salty, the salad was soggy, the chicken was bland, the hamburgers and hotdogs were burned...

Supergirl Fails

But I spent the morning with hubby drinking coffee and shopping for the party..

I spent the next few hours in the kitchen with my favorite people... my daughters and a new borrowed addition to our family D1s friend from college(who we want to adopt or kidnap)

I talked to friends that I love for the afternoon, some who I see everyday and never run out of things to talk about and some who I dont see often but feel like i saw them yesterday when we get together.

I had wine with D1s friends from high school who no matter what they do behind my back always walk into my house and greet me enthusiastically and politely make conversation and feel just as comfortable with adults as they do with their own.

I slept in my own bed close to the love of my life, (until his snoring drove me out)

and i woke up to live another day, healthy and happy and looking forward to more good things to come this week.

Supergirl I may not be but superhappy I am.

Its all good

For today.

And I treasure that. You have to. Take pleasure in the small moments. They come but once but in the end they add up to a lifetime of memories.